Playing Defense

No, not sports defense, defense in the club against sleazy sexual predators.

Let's face it, when you go out, some guy will try and hit on you (because we know all of our blog readers are hot gorgeous babes). Now, sometimes, if they're cute, this is welcome. Other times, not so much.

So, here is our top 5 defensive moves against the sleeze:

5.) If you are thrown a really cheesy pick up line, like, "Are you tired? Cuz you've been running through my mind all day!" Give him cheese back and say, "Thanks, my night wouldn't have been complete without a little cheeeese." See, meet cheesy with cheesy, corny with corny.



4.) If a guy is a hoverer. You know, the ones that come around you but don't actually dance with you or say anything or do anything, they just...hover. And stare. They also like to stare. If you have one of these and he's cute, obviously dance with him and put him out of his misery. If not, then when they get closer you need to do this:



Break into your best Saturday Night Fever imitation so if he gets anywhere near you he'll get his eyes poked out by your pointy disco fingers.

3.) If you're at the bar and a guy buys you a drink and then, because he's bought you said drink, decides that entitles him to say something really stupid or derogatory, feel free to tell him he can have his drink back and then proceed to dump it on him.

Aiming low is good

4.) If a guy comes up behind you and starts freaking you, move close to a random guy that looks bigger than the one behind you, then slip out of the way so creepy guy is now freaking big random guy and hope big random guy punches him.

5.) If he's really sleazy and really gross, as in, greasy hair, half unbuttoned shirt with hairy chest and a lot of gold chains, then your #1 line of defense is to scream and run away. The screaming alerts other innocent girls to the creepy threat approaching, so please, if you encounter such creepiness, please do your fellow sister a favor and sound the alarm.


And with that scary image, that we hope ingrains in you the importance of learning to play defense, have a safe and sleeze free weekend!