Trash Talkin'- To Hate or to Participate

If you've got a good office pool going with a competitive bunch of people (and every office has its own versions of Dwight Schrute and Andy Bernard), there will be trash talking. It's a part of the March Madness office pool culture and it doesn't matter if there's money on the line or just bragging rights- there are some people (and maybe you're one of them) who love to create drama. There are two positions you can find yourself in- on the offense where you're trash talking to somebody, or on the defense, when someone's coming to tell you that your teams are doomed.

Offense: Being a pro-active trash talker is going to be a little tricky if you don't know much about the teams. But it also provides you the perfect opportunity to talk (okay, flirt) with that new guy you've been eyeing. You're going to have to do a little research to do this right, but let's face it, you've been stalking him for the past couple weeks anyway (so what if you know he eats lunch at 12:15pm everyday, has an affinity for cool ranch Doritos and can go for a month without repeating his ties? You're naturally observant). You probably already know who he has winning the championship and any special allegiances he has to any of the teams. Is his college Alma mater in the playoffs? Who are his favorites? Once you've figured that out you need to do a little research. Take a look at the teams he's chosen to make it to the Final Four and the Championship. How've they done in previous years? How about the players? Do any of them buckle under pressure? Hey, no one ever said flirty trash talking was going to be effortless. Next, pick out weak spots in the teams and go for the jugular (uh, playfully of course). For example: "You have Duke winning it all? No way.... Duke's a bunch of chokers, they look like they're going to make it and then they break you heart. Plus, they've lost to both UNC games this year! No reason to think that's going to change, so you might as well pay up right now."

Defense: You'll probably find yourself on the defense more often than the offense. We'd say that the best defense is to turn the tables, but there's only so much you can do if you don't know much about the teams. The best course of action here may be just a generic but defiant "It's still early in the tourney" or a skeptical "Mmmhmm, we'll see about that" with a crafty smile throw in.

In any case, do not get intimidated by trash talking. Put your game face on and embrace it.

Enjoy the games this weekend, whether you're watching them willingly or not! Remember to check back Monday when we'll have a recap of what went down and the teams that have survived to play another day.